Sunday, December 28, 2008

What's a Trip Without Chaos?

It has been a while since I actually posted so I thought I would give some updates.

Being the phenomenal procrastinator that I am, our trip was scheduled to begin on Saturday the 20th. I had plotted and begged trying to figure out a way to start the trip on Friday because that would give me more time with my family. I had nothing done though. Still had gifts to wrap, laundry to do, and I still had to pack. Of course, because I had nothing done, the husband's unit decides that they can sign out early and start their leave on Friday. Nice, eh? I busted my butt to try and get things done and waited for the husband to arrive. He finally did and we decided there was still too much that really needed to be done so we would stick with the original plan of leaving at 3am Saturday. Which turned out to be 4am we got on the road.

The first leg of our trip took us to my dad's house. It was the longest day in a car...ever. I worried myself sick about the problems we had been having with the van so I was miserable! We made it, without incident, in about 10 hours. With two kids and a dog. Shew!

We had dinner and Christmas at my sister's Saturday. I finally got to meet my neice who is 10 months old and see my 2 year old nephew for the third time. Oh and meet my newest nephew who is 5 months old. Crazy how I never see my family! Thanks, Army!

We only spent a couple of days with my family and headed to Tennessee to see my stepchildren. It, of course, had to be drama filled and involve the police. What else do you expect from someone like her? It was fun. We got to spend the last few days with the kids and see most of his family. Well, they are my family, too. All of the Christmas festivities are finally done and so we have some down time.

I feel a little worn out. I also managed to become ill within a week of being in Tennessee. Crap! My allergies or sinuses or whatever HATE to be here. They prove it every time! We are chilaxing now and are down to only one kiddo. It feels strange. We are at the inlaws' house and are so used to it being busting at the seams with people that now it's only the three of us and we are a little at a loss on what to do! I think I will attempt to return my MIL's house to the order in which we found it. We have managed to, within the last almost week, destroy her home!

I will have pictures at some point. I have to unlazy myself and search the computer for them. There are some great ones. I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas and will have a very Happy New Year. I know I did and will!!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Song In Lights





On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me,





A Partidge in a pear tree.



On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me,





Two turtle doves.



On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me,




Three french hens.

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,




Four calling birds.


On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,



Five golden rings.

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,




Six geese-a-laying.

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,



Seven swans-a-swimming.

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,



Eight maids-a-milking.

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,



Nine ladies dancing.

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,



Ten Lords-a-leaping.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,


Eleven pipers piping.


On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me,


Twelve drummers drumming.
I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas. I am having a blast with my family! I will be back to posting sometime after the holidays!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Big White Tube

Today I had an MRI on my knee. If you saw my twitter messages, you know I was a little concerned. I was fine until this morning and all of the sudden I was worried about that stupid big white tube. Once I got to the hospital, I thought of leaving and not getting it done. No one would know. Surely I could lie and cover my butt. Then I thought of the pain I have been in and decided to stick it out.

I sat in the Radiology waiting room and a thought occurred to me. Will they need to use needles? When I was told that it is possible (DamamaT), I started to think the pain wasn't that bad and that I could lie and cover my butt quite well, thank you very much. Alas, I stayed.

There were no needles involved (thanks for the prayers DamamaT)! I want you to know how horrible it is to lay in the tube though bloggyworld. It sucked. Big time. I had headphones to try to drown out the LOUD machine, but there was no music so it just muffled it a bit. I was laying flat on my back (I also have back problems) and my knee was pushed down and strapped that way. Oh. My. God. I seriously thought I would die. I think I spent 5 hours laying like that (more like 30 minutes or so). Not moving.

Do you know how impossible it is to lay perfectly still when you are told that is all you have to do? I had involuntary muscle spasms. My nose itched. My head was hurting from my pony tail. Oh, and if anyone saw the episode of ER not too long ago where they turned on the machine and the patient was sucked to the machine by the magnet because they forgot to remove the metal backboard, you will understand that I was in fear of my tongue being ripped out of my mouth by the magnet. You see, I have a piercing and I couldn't remember if the thing was metal or not. I attempted to remove it, but the MRI lady said it would be fine. Then she said "if it starts to bother you, just let us know". Not a smart thing to say to a nutty person. I layed there waiting for my tongue to be ripped out of my mouth the whole time. Every time that machine started a new round or whatever it is it does, I would think "Uh oh, it's gonna happen this time". It never did. I still have a tongue in my mouth. Woot!

They also made the mistake of giving me a CD with the images on it. This was promptly inserted into my computer where I scrutinized every image and then googled normal knee MRIs. My knee does not look like those knees. I am no doctor, but I think I may have a problem there. I called the doctor to figure out how it is I am to find out what my problem is (HUSH) and was told my doctor is on emergency leave. Super. I am scheduled with another doctor tomorrow morning though. I am thrilled. I will know what is going to happen before I head home.

And speaking of heading home, we leave Saturday. Unless I can convince the husband to sneak out of here tomorrow. The military has this thing about leave and days and blah blah blah. Either way, this will probably be my last post before leaving. I haven't packed a thing. I also have not wrapped everything. Blah.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Less Than Stellar

Yes, that's me. It appears that no matter how hard I try to be organized and not get myself into pickles, I do it. I have talked about this upcoming trip for the last month. I have been making plans in my mind. I have attempted to get all of my crap together. I am failing miserably. I am pretty sure that a simple trip home should not cause all of this stress. Really.

Due to my obsessive internet addiction, nothing is done. I have managed to wrap a few gifts. I have managed to assemble a pile of crap that I need to take on the trip. I made a list to make sure I don't forget anything. Funny thing about making a list is that you have to keep up with the list. If any of you happen to see a list of random items, that'd be my packing list. Please return it to me!

This week I have to get all of my laundry done. I have to wrap all of the gifts. I have to pack everyone's clothes. I have to do this stuff, yet I am sitting here telling the bloggyworld what I need to do instead of doing it. I am thinking if I make my list here, I will be able to find it because, as you can tell, I am always able to find my way to my blog. If it weren't for this blog, I don't know what I would do with myself! Wait...if it weren't for the blog (and toddler up my butt all day every day) I wouldn't be rushing to get my laundry done. It would all be done and folded and put away too. Where it would be easy to locate clothing that is clean and wearable.

No one back home cares if I wear dirty clothes and have a Pigpen-like funk cloud following me around do they? Hope not.

I am still looking forward to the trip. I just need someone to come and get my stuff together. I want to be like the husband. I want to be told at what time to jump in the vehicle headed out of town and trust that my clothes and things are clean, packed, and loaded into the vehicle. Wouldn't that be great? How is it that he gets to avoid all of the chaos that is my life? I am perplexed by this situation.

If you have made it this far into this post, I will tell you that I wasted an hour and a half of my life last night. No, not on that. We watched The Happening. I want my time back. I could have been blissfully dreaming or something. I hated that movie. The night before, we watched Shutter. That was a creepy, but good movie. It has a The Ring type feel to it. I also wasted countless hours playing Rayman Raving Rabbids this weekend. It was great. Maybe all of the game playing and movie watching has something to do with my lack of getting anything done?

If my posting for the next month is spotty, please understand. I am busily preparing for the trip and then taking the trip. Who am I kidding? You all know I will be here to rant!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Yeah, Ummm, Sure

DQ and I were discussing our upcoming trip. We are all so excited! I was a little shocked when my baby brother sent me a text mentioning how thrilled he is to see us. The more we texted, the more I realized I don't even know the last time I saw my baby brother. Isn't that absurd? I am sure it was on one of my visits to my Dad's house, but neither of us can remember when it would have been. It was at least 3 years ago because somewhere around 3 years ago we had family portraits. I don't believe I have seen him since. He was in the Navy and stationed up in Yankeeville. Now he is married (never met her) and has a baby!

I have also not seen my other brother and my sister since January. My sister has two kids now. She only had one in January. I have only seen that nephew twice and he is 2. I haven't met my neice yet. It really is pathetic. I don't know how things like this happen. I will just blame the military. Sounds good to me. So, not only does this trip mean I get to reunite with people I was used to seeing DAILY when I lived in TN, now I will reunite with my blood family that I never see. Ever. Apparently.

Enough about me and my pathetic family relations. You should check out this new giveaway on this fantabulous blog that I will now stalk forever and ever.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Out of Control

I think I am stressing everyone in my life out. Seriously. I am stressing me out so I know it's getting to everyone else. We are planning the trip. No, I am planning our trip. I have so many things to try to get sorted out that it is just making me ill!

My super, wonderful, awesome mother in law has kindly offered to keep the kids for us one night to go and spend some time together. Alone. No kids. I have gone back and forth a million times trying to decide what I want to do. I mean what we want to do. I spent hours looking into hotels in Gatlinburg for New Year's Eve. I even dragged poor AA into it and kept her from doing things I am sure she would have rather been doing. Now? I am not so sure that I want to go to Gatlinburg for New Year's Eve. The price of the hotel is ridiculous. The crowd will be ridiculous. And most importantly, we always spend New Year's Eve with the kids. We watch movies, play games, and eat tons and tons of junk food. It was a tradition my dad started when I was a kid and he named it "Party 'Til Ya Puke". How could we not do this? Sorry, Amber. I suck.

I am also calling and emailing my poor mother in law at least a few times a day to change plans or add to the itinerary. Sometimes, I just need a little smack in the head. She knows this. I love her for it. She calmly told me this morning I needed to get a grip. She was right. I am getting a grip now. Mkay, Mom? Anywho, enough trip business for now. See, I am going to stress out my other reader now!

I stumbled across a blog this morning...I really don't remember how. I start clicking and there is no stopping me! She is having some giveaways and since I want you all to have a chance at winning (both of you, my dear readers), I am going to tell you about them. It has nothing to do with the fact that I get more chances to win by telling you. She is giving away this awesome thing that is a secret because if I win it I am so presenting it to someone. Mom, don't click on the links, mkay? There is also this really cool thing, and this thing. Oh, and one last thing. Don't you love the mystery? You have to click to find out what the 'things' are! Love it!
Here is a picture of one of my best friends. My friend that enables me to wake up and carry on with my day. Every. Single. Day.

Mmmmmm coffee! Sounds good about now, too!

Monday, December 8, 2008

Public Service Announcement:

Put your ta-tas away when going to the elementary school to pick up your child(ren). Not doing so leaves you open to be discussed on my blog, given the stinkeye by other mothers, and makes you look like a street walker! It is also a pretty good idea to refrain from arriving at the school with a bare midriff.

Maybe I will be considered a prude for feeling this way, but I am okay with that. I go to the school daily to retrieve DQ and see women dressed for a night-on-the-town-to-pick-up-a-man almost every day. I can't fathom why a 30 something year old woman feels the need to have her cleavage out there for every little boy and girl to see, but they do it. One woman in particular I have come to look for because she is so over the top with her attire. One day last week she arrived wearing a black mini tank, a black shirt over it that was see through, a pair of tight, tight jeans, and boots with a 4 inch heel. At an elementary school. At 3 in the afternoon.

I have become accustomed to seeing women arrive with hair perfectly fixed, makeup applied meticulously, and clothing that was likely seen on a runway model. It makes me wonder. Do these women have so little to do in their lives that they get that dressed up just to pick up little Jill or Jack from school?

Maybe part of it is jealousy? I mean, I am barely able to manage pulling on a pair of jeans, throwing my hair in a pony tail, and putting on a bra. Nah. It isn't that I can't manage, it's really that I choose not to bother. DQ should be happy I don't show up bra-less wearing my PJs and slippers. Not that I sit around like that every day unless I have somewhere to go. Nope. Not me.

Anywho, regardless of how cute you think you are, how skinny you are, or how desperate you may be for attention, refrain from showing up to the school ta-tas on display, along with your belly. We (the general public) do not wish to see it. There is a time and place for everything. An elementary school is neither.

Should I even bring up the fact that this school is on a military post and unless you are the service member (which is highly doubtful because you aren't in uniform...ever), that would mean you are a married woman. I haven't seen your husband by your side and could easily venture to say that he is deployed, but I won't go into that. Basically, keep your bidness out of my face and I won't talk about how you dress like a hooker. Mkay?

**Had to add this part:
Read this post to the husband (because I love for him to see how great I am) and as soon as I started reading the part of the one woman in particular, he looked at me and said "Red headed chick?". That. Is. Sad.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

That's a Wrap!

What is with my this and that posts lately? I can't seem to keep my thoughts on one particular subject for very long. This is leading to the insomnia thing. Which really bites because this mama needs her sleep. I gave up on calling it beauty rest long, long ago. It's a lie people. A big fat lie. If I slept 22 hours out of every single day, it would not make a difference.

There is a blog that I read daily. Well as daily as I can. Womb At The InnSane. She is hilarious. Through reading her blog, I became associated with The Classy Closet. The Classy Closet is a social networking site that offers much, much more. They are having a giveaway right now for a Dirt Devil Kwik. I won one! My name is there on the main page of the site in neon lights. Okay. I made part of that up. I am not telling which part. Also, they have a radio show every weekday. They are campaigning for 1,000 listeners to the show on January 9th. If they reach the goal, they can submit the show to Sirius radio for consideration. Go over and check the site out and become a listener to the show.


In other news, the kids, well mostly DQ and I, have been gettin' crafty with it this weekend. We made these glittery snowflake window clings (and although the pictures don't show it well they are glittery):






We also made these cute little candy cane sign post ornaments. Which aren't completed so I will post the pics tomorrow. Oh, and I almost forgot we also started on a special gift for the Grandparents which I can't post here, well I could, but I won't because I am mean like that. The ideas came from two of my favorite craft idea places: http://www.familyfun.com/ and http://www.dltk-kids.com/ . I love those sites.

I also dressed up the kiddos and took some Christmas pictures. Just in case you missed the HUGE header.

I also managed to clean out the van. Oh! My! Gawsh! I do believe we have squatters. There could be no other explanation for the 5 bags of trash, one bag of miscellaneous crap, half load of laundry, and two vacuum canisters full of grossness that came out of there. No. Other. Explanation. I have never lived in the van, thus neither have my children. AND we have cleaned it out since the trip here in July. In fact, I went and vacuumed it out at the car wash just a bit ago. Maybe two months ago? Apparently the squatters are slobs like the people that live inside the house.
This is how we made the most of our weekend. Now, I am in mission mode. I am asking my readers, yes, you and you, to please help with these two missions. The first is to go and read

Derfina's blog. Her post today touched me in a very special place. My heart. Perverts. So go read, love Derfina as I do (I seriously think I have a girl crush, but don't tell her), and do what you can...
The second mission is this: help me find things to keep the kiddos entertained on the 16 hour trip in the van. You didn't think I would let a post go by without mentioning my trip home in 13 days, did you? Seriously. Give me ideas, websites, something. I have the DVD player, but am not going to be spending a ton buying new movies because I am cheap like that. So, help!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Typical Saturday

A typical Saturday in this house goes something like this:

8am: Wake up because the toddler is in her room screaming Mama! Bring toddler to my bedroom to wake the husband because nothing is better than being woken up by a toddler jumping on your midsection (and lower hehe).

8:30am: Kids are fed bowls of cereal while coffee is being made and the parents are waking up.

9:ooam: Coffee and surfing the web while children run around tearing apart the house.

11am: Whining of boredom and hunger ensues. From the husband. Not the children.

12ishpm: Agreement is made. The husband and I will make breakfast together.

So, this happening today was nothing unusual. Neither is the fact that the husband enjoyed watching whatever movie he was watching for the billionth time while I made breakfast. He did manage to wander in the kitchen where I sent him on a hunt through the cabinet and pantry for self rising flour. He came up empty and mumbled something about not having homemade biscuits afterall before he disappeared into the living room again. I of course made the biscuits with all purpose flour and saved the day. As I was making the biscuits, something came over me. I began making comments in this silly little voice. It was something like the gingerbread man in Shrek's voice. I said things like "Don't worry I will make the breakfast by myself as usual", "Don't worry I have it under control", "Don't worry I only put a little poison in the biscuits". All of these comments went ignored. Seemingly unheard. Then he mosied (is that a word) into the kitchen:

Him:What are you in here mumbling about?
Me: Uh. Nothing.
Him: Something. I could hear blah blah blah blah blah in a strange voice.
Me: (Begins laughing hysterically) Nothing at all, dear.
Him: You have lost your mind, haven't you?

He again disappeared. He later returns at a stressful moment in the breakfast cooking process where I didn't have time to be bothered. He asked what he needed to do. I turned around with a (butter) knife in my hand. He flashed me. This resulted in another fit of giggles. Apparently, he was trying to show me where to stab him where I thought he was trying to distract me with his gorgeous chest. I put him to work stirring the sausage (for the gravy).

Of course, about the time breakfast is done (at 1pm) DQ and the toddler are coming in ready for more food. Funny how they always get two meals to my one. I will have you know, bloggyverse, not one of the members of this household have said anything resembling words of gratitude or praise. As I type this, I am being stared at by DQ who is awaiting second helpings. I haven't even managed to finish my plate yet. Aye!

So, what are typical Saturdays like in your house?

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Rants, Raves and Other

I have had lots going on. I even thought "Oh, I am soooo going to blog that", but then I forget what that was. So this is going to be a little bit of this and that. Some whining. Some joy. Some other stuff of some sort.

We are planning this big trip home (can NOT wait) to Tennessee (Gatlinburg, anyone?) in a couple of weeks and I have had some issues. Shut up! I wanted to make sure the kids had plenty to do on the trip. It is 16 hours in a vehicle. So I searched high and low for a cheap good deal on portable DVD system for the van. I found one. I informed DQ I had ordered one, and did she say "Oh, wow, Mom you are the best!"? Nope. Did she say "That is a great thing to do for us, Mom!"? Nope. She complained. Whined. I believe even shed a few tears. Why? Because there is only one DVD player and two screens, thus they have to watch the same movie. Brat! Can you believe that nonsense?

I received the system I bought today. I am so excited. Obviously more excited than the brat! Lucky for her, Mom is smart. I can hook her DVD player from her room into the second screen and not listen to her mouth! Anywho, the system is pretty, came with everything I need, and was a great price! Go me!

The other issue I have had is a little problem we have been having in the van. The one we plan to drive across the country. I think it MAY be fixed. Please keep your fingers crossed. If not, I may drive it off into a lake or river or something. And I may forget to jump out at the last minute.

The toddler's vocabulary and skillz have just expanded exponentially lately! She says all kinds of words. And I do mean ALL. The other day I was in the kitchen and did something which resulted in an "Oh Shit!" escaping. Yeah she was sitting there and said it too. (Sorry Mom!) She also will count with me, when she feels like it, of course. She also likes to point at the Christmas tree and say "pretty", then look at me out of the corner of her eye while she nonchalantly hits an ornament to make it bounce around. Yes, she knows she isn't supposed to. She also is playing the game all kids eventually learn to play. Mommy says, pick up your toys. She ignores. This happens repeatedly. Daddy finally pipes up from behind his computer screen and says The Toddler (except her real name), pick up the blocks now. She picks them all up. What on earth? Isn't she too young to have me figured out as the lazy nice parent?

Back to the trip home. I am ec-freaking-static! Only 15 days til we leave. Only a couple of stress filled days at my dad's then off to BLISS at the in-laws! Is it bad that visits with my dad are stressful to me? I hope not. Let me be clear though. It isn't my dad that bothers me, its the kids in his spotless, OCD house. I feel as though I have to chase them around picking up and vacuuming everywhere they walk. Now, he has never said that they make messes and it bothers him, it's just in my head. Shut up! After those days, we get to see everyone else and I can not wait. I will probably mention this trip in every post for the next 2 weeks!

Ok, I think I am done rambling for now. Oh, wait, no I am not. Did you see the story about the Bratz dolls (AKA plastic prostitutes around here by adults)? Can you believe that? You haven't heard it? You really should check into the news once in a while. Basically, after the holidays the dolls will not be sold anymore. The creator created them while working for another company yada yada. Bottom line: No more plastic prostitutes!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

New Meal Week

I know it's the middle of the week almost. I know that I am late posting this. It's not my fault. It's the kids. The husband, too.


I am tired of eating the same meals week after week. I had to go to hell the commissary today so I spent the morning going through cookbooks looking for new ideas. Boy, oh, boy did I score big!


See, I had some turkey leftover from T-Day, and some mashed tators too. I don't eat leftover mashed tators, but the husband put them in the fridge, so I had them. I found a recipe for a super easy chicken casserole and substituted the turkey for the chicken. I also got a recipe for Leftover Mashed Potato cakes. Oh, MY! It was yummyyyyyyy! It was in a Southern Living recipe book, Easy Weeknight Favorites. The casserole was a can of cream of chicken soup (undiluted), 8oz sour cream, 3 cups cooked chicken (substituted turkey), 1 tbsp poppy seeds (yeah, left those out) mix all that together and put in a greased pan. Top with 1 1/2 crushed Ritz crackers and drizzle with a 1/4 melted butter. Bake at 350 for 30 minutes. This little thing got mucho praise out of the husband and he even said something along the lines of how it wasn't some other woman's turkey. Ya know, kind of a reference to this situation. The leftover potato pancakes were also delicious, but I am way to lazy to type out that recipe (if you want it ask me, if I like you, I might give it to ya!). It was easy though.


So anywho, this week I am trying all new recipes. For the entire week. We will either be very happy, well-fed people OR we will be starving to death. Either way, I will be sure to let you know how it goes! Oh, and the toddler won't starve. She can open the fridge and get out handfuls of grapes for herself. Anytime she wants. Dontcha know!


Just an idea of the recipes I will be trying this week:

Sausage Stuffed French Loaf with a tomato and cucumber salad

Tortilla chili casserole with mexican cheese toast

Ham and potato casserole with an asparagus stir fry

Salmon bake and baked potatoes

Oregano chicken

Bet you wanna head to Texas for dinner dontcha? Well, c'mon then!

Those SITStas Are At It Again!

Click to play

Today is the day of SITSmas. There are comments and giveaways galore so take some time to check it all out! It's where all of the cool people hang out! Don't worry, I snuck in on a technicality! But, don't tell them!

Have a Merry SITSmas!

P.S. I forgot to mention (yes, actually forgot not just thought it would be better for me if you didn't enter) the Grand Prize for SITSmas is a $200 Target gift card. Who can't use that this time of year?

Here is the link the the next card.